From the amazing and hilarious (if rude, crude, and occasionally completely unacceptable) Tumblr, Texts from Dog.
1. He doesn’t understand the concept of money or ownership. Well, except that he will happily “mark” anything you steal, which will lead the police right to both of you when his DNA shows up everywhere.
2. He is easily distracted, regardless of what he’s supposed to be doing. Unless, of course, you are stealing something edible, in which case the bounty won’t make it to your car.
3. Regardless of what he believes, he does not have superpowers. And, really, do you want the molding corpses of smaller animals along for the ride when you take off, tires screeching, Batdog’s ears flying back as he sticks his head out the window?
HYSTERICAL…. SO my english bulldog!!!!
This is amaaaaazing. (Not that I’m given to hyperbole or anything.) Seriously, though, just had to email this link to my roommates: we could not stop laughing the last time we saw a collection of these texts. So funny.
oh those are great they make me piddle myself with gleee…still prefer my cat though.